I don’t know about your house, but we have some funny-ass conversations at my house.

Two weeks ago, Hubby came inside and asked, “Do you wanna see something weird?”

Now, I don’t know how it is in YOUR house, but in my house, I’ve gotten in trouble one too many times by answering that question.

So I said nothing.

Then he spoke again, “Go outside on the balcony and look down at the steps.”

Ok, now I know I’m seeing something I haven’t seen before, so I got up and looked.

“Is it dead?” I asked Hubby, watching it intently.

“I don’t think so, it just moved.”

“I didn’t see it! Damn it!”

Hubby went inside to put something away.

“Do you think it’s taking a nap?” I asked.

“I don’t think so.”

“Maybe it’s Narcoleptic” I suggested.

“I don’t think that either. Maybe it fell jumping from a tree.”

“But there aren’t any trees around from it to fall from. Maybe the roof?”

“I’m not sure.”

“I’m going to call animal control. I can’t take a dog for a walk past that! What if it wakes up? That’s all I need.”

So I called the police and they said they’d send animal control out, and if the squirrel got up before he got there, to call them back.

So Hubby and I went out on the balcony and watched the squirrel.

“See, there it moved again,” said Hubby.

“I don’t see any blood, and it’s not twitching like it’s dying.”

The squirrel would move very subtly every minute or so.

“Do you think it’s having babies?” I asked. “I mean, I would think they’d have them in a nest, but what if the labor came on suddenly?”

The squirrel moved again, ever so slowly, like it was trying to roll over on it’s side.

“I think it’s a goner,” Hubby said, “This is it.”

But it didn’t roll over.

Then Hubby said, “There not going to try and save it, you know.”

“But I want them to try! It’s a living creature!”

“It’s just another tree rat, there are millions of them.”

That’s when I started rooting for the squirrel.

Then it’s little eyes flickered and tried to open.

“Oh my God, look at it’s wee little eyes. Oh I want to cry.”

“Then go inside!” Hubby barked at me.

But it was like one of those train wreck movies. You KNOW something bad is going to happen, but you just can’t look away.

Then the squirrel really showed signs of rousing. It shifted position, it opened its eyes, then it tried to stand.

The animal control van rolled up the street, and right past the house.

“Get up, get up” I whispered.

The squirrel stood. It climbed up one step.

“You better run squirrel” (Five points if you know what movie that references.) 🙂

It took a couple of hops.

Animal control was cruising back down the street, and slowing at my driveway, but the squirrel had already made its way to the other side of the house.

I breathed a sigh of relief as I walked out to the street to tell animal control the squirrel had run off.

He asked me which way it went, and I said, “It ran into the woods.”

So…anyone have any thoughts of what might have happened? I’d love to hear some theories.