Heart Like a Dog

The Good, the Bad, and the Oh My God of living with dogs!

How to Train Your Human

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Hi peeps, this is Sampson Stone here. I wanted to share something funny with you all.

Sometimes my dad leaves the TV on when he leaves for work, which is how I noticed a movie, “How to Train Your Dragon, the Hidden World” is being released in few days.

For you dogs who don’t know what I’m talking about, some fool humans made a movie about training dragons. I mean, what the woof? There aren’t any dragons around anymore, and they are making a big deal about some cartoon kid training a ‘dragon’ when us dogs have been training our humans since our ancestors figured out they had food.

Doesn’t that make you want to howl at the moon?

Har har har

And they say “THEY” domesticated US, I SAY, it’s the other way around!

Here are a couple of tricks Delilah and I have been teaching our mom.

Our mom is trained to get up in the morning and take me, then Delilah for our walks, and then she’s trained to hurry home from work, to take us on MORE walks! On those walks, we’ve trained her to pick up our poops (not nice to leave those precious presents in someone else’s yard) CARRY them BACK to our yard, where she saves them in a handy bin, until… once a week she has a truck PICK up the precious poops and she ships them off to somewhere else for safe keeping.

The new trick I’m working with mom on is to give me treats on my walk. Don’t let your tail the wrong way, she’s been trained for quite some time to give me treats after I pee or poop, BUT the newest trick is to give me treats every few steps.

The way I train that is this. I step off to sniff something and when I’m done, I stop and wait for her to give me a treat. If she doesn’t right away, I’ll start walking, but then I stop and wait.

She’s being so slow to learn this trick. I mean, it starts off good. She gives me treat, treat, treat and then she slacks off and says things like, “Come on Sampson…I don’t have time for this… I have to give Delilah her walk too… stop being a little asshole.”

Sometimes she loses focus and just laughs, but I have that dogged determination and I keep working it, on every single walk.

Do any of your four-legged howlers have any tips on how you train YOUR human?

Get Out of the Car – Slowly

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As with most events of late, I’m not there with my camera when they do something funny. I mean, let’s face it, most of our walks are in the dark.

Nothing to see there.

Except for Friday night. Friday night I was walking Sampson, and relishing in the fact the leaves had all been picked up and I no longer had to worry about a dog suddenly dive into the leaves.

As we came down the hill, I made note of the car parked in front of a neighbor’s house. Sampson was diddly bopping along when suddenly he spotted the car as well.

He walked right up to the front, then lifted his head, and craned his neck so he could check out the inside. Not seeing anything, he moved along to the driver’s door, then finally to the rear panel, checking each window out as he passed. All the while I was telling him there was no-one in the car.

At the rear of the car, he stopped and barked at it, as if to say, “Hey, get out of the car, I need some loving.”

That’s when I lost it. I laughed so hard at my sweet, social guy.

What did your pet do that made you laugh or smile this week?

You make me laugh (or smile), the sweet, funny, loving things my dogs do that make me laugh or smile.

Burn Baby, Burn

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I will more than likely burn in hell for what I’m about to type.

Okay….so those of you who know me, know I’m probably burning in hell regardless because well….let’s just say this probably isn’t the worse thing I’ve ever thought or said. And I’ll leave it at that .

Most of you know Delilah is dealing with heart issues, along with a progressive cornea disease called Endothelial Decompensation (Endothelial, another word I don’t need to look up.) In lay terms; Delilah’s corneas are thinning, which allows fluid to get behind the cornea, and it can cause blisters in her eyes. To try and prevent this from happening, I put a saline ointment in her eyes twice a day to try and keep fluid from building up in her eyes.

While most dogs with this disease don’t go blind, there can be some sight loss and Delilah has definitely experienced this.

I know she sees contrast far better than she sees in a traditional manner, I know this because I watch her and I can tell how she stops sometimes and stares in the direction she heard a noise, trying to figure out what it is.

Well, Jodi, why are you worried about burning in hell for that? It’s factual and there’s nothing wrong with that?

Yeah, that’s not what I’m burning in hell for.

This is.

Friday morning I was sitting watching the news, when Delilah heard something (what I don’t know) and jumped up, dashed over to the couch to stare out the window.

That’s when I LAUGHED and said, “What the hell are you looking at, you can’t see anyway.”

I know. Burn baby, burn.

You make me laugh (or smile,) the sweet, funny, loving things dogs do that make us laugh or smile.

What did your pet do that made you laugh or smile this week?

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