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Conversations At My House

June 13, 2017 By Jodi

I don’t know about your house, but we have some funny-ass conversations at my house.

Yum, yum, what’s on the menu today?

Two weeks ago, Hubby came inside and asked, “Do you wanna see something weird?”

Now, I don’t know how it is in YOUR house, but in my house, I’ve gotten in trouble one too many times by answering that question.

So I said nothing.

Then he spoke again, “Go outside on the balcony and look down at the steps.”

Ok, now I know I’m seeing something I haven’t seen before, so I got up and looked.

WTF?

“Is it dead?” I asked Hubby, watching it intently.

“I don’t think so, it just moved.”

“I didn’t see it! Damn it!”

Hubby went inside to put something away.

“Do you think it’s taking a nap?” I asked.

“I don’t think so.”

“Maybe it’s Narcoleptic” I suggested.

“I don’t think that either. Maybe it fell jumping from a tree.”

“But there aren’t any trees around from it to fall from. Maybe the roof?”

“I’m not sure.”

“I’m going to call animal control. I can’t take a dog for a walk past that! What if it wakes up? That’s all I need.”

So I called the police and they said they’d send animal control out, and if the squirrel got up before he got there, to call them back.

So Hubby and I went out on the balcony and watched the squirrel.

“See, there it moved again,” said Hubby.

“I don’t see any blood, and it’s not twitching like it’s dying.”

The squirrel would move very subtly every minute or so.

“Do you think it’s having babies?” I asked. “I mean, I would think they’d have them in a nest, but what if the labor came on suddenly?”

The squirrel moved again, ever so slowly, like it was trying to roll over on it’s side.

“I think it’s a goner,” Hubby said, “This is it.”

But it didn’t roll over.

Then Hubby said, “There not going to try and save it, you know.”

“But I want them to try! It’s a living creature!”

“It’s just another tree rat, there are millions of them.”

That’s when I started rooting for the squirrel.

Then it’s little eyes flickered and tried to open.

“Oh my God, look at it’s wee little eyes. Oh I want to cry.”

“Then go inside!” Hubby barked at me.

But it was like one of those train wreck movies. You KNOW something bad is going to happen, but you just can’t look away.

Then the squirrel really showed signs of rousing. It shifted position, it opened its eyes, then it tried to stand.

The animal control van rolled up the street, and right past the house.

“Get up, get up” I whispered.

The squirrel stood. It climbed up one step.

“You better run squirrel” (Five points if you know what movie that references.) 🙂

It took a couple of hops.

Animal control was cruising back down the street, and slowing at my driveway, but the squirrel had already made its way to the other side of the house.

I breathed a sigh of relief as I walked out to the street to tell animal control the squirrel had run off.

He asked me which way it went, and I said, “It ran into the woods.”

So…anyone have any thoughts of what might have happened? I’d love to hear some theories.

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Comments

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Filed Under: Humor Tagged With: Humor

Comments

  1. Callie, Shadow, and Ducky's Mom says

    June 13, 2017 at 1:00 am

    Maybe something frightened the poor little thing and it decided to play dead until the danger had passed?

    Anyway, I’m glad he got up and ran away before Animal Control could get to him!

  2. Emma says

    June 13, 2017 at 7:07 am

    I have no idea, but I would have love to have caught it for you! Maybe it had fallen and it’s head and was still recovering?

  3. Basil says

    June 13, 2017 at 8:46 am

    Awwww poor little squirrel, thank goodness he got away 🙂

    Wishing mew a pawesome week

    Bestest purrs

    Basil & Co xox

  4. Mary Hone says

    June 13, 2017 at 9:23 am

    I’m going to vote it got conked on the head somehow, and was dazed. He probably had a headache for a little while.

  5. Monika & Sam says

    June 13, 2017 at 9:35 am

    No clue but I applaud your humanity. Having had a squirrel chew a gigantic hole in my kitchen window last week (for the second time), I’m sure I wouldn’t be cheering one on. Good on you!

  6. jan says

    June 13, 2017 at 11:15 am

    I’ve seen them fall long distances and get right back up

  7. All Things Collie says

    June 13, 2017 at 12:41 pm

    Poor little guy, hope he is ok. I wonder if a cat was messing with him? They don’t usually back off though, so that’s not too likely.

  8. Jan K says

    June 13, 2017 at 2:09 pm

    I’ve seen enough birds slam into the windows and just lay there stunned for a bit, so I also think he probably fell from somewhere and was just trying to recover.
    He’ll never know the awful fate that he dodged! Even though they can be pesky rodents, I’m with you….I was rooting for him to get away.

  9. Beth says

    June 13, 2017 at 3:40 pm

    Oh dear. Poor squirrel. Whatever was going on with it, it wouldn’t have had a chance to rest and recover if Rye had known about it.

  10. Pamela says

    June 13, 2017 at 3:52 pm

    I’ve gotten to the paranoid place where every time I see a wild animal not scurrying away, I assume it has rabies.

    Hopefully the guy was just stunned.

  11. mommakatandherbearcat says

    June 13, 2017 at 4:04 pm

    That would’ve been horrible for me to see. I’d be crying and a mess wanting to save the little guy. So I definitely understand where you’re coming from! Where were these men raised?!?!

  12. Jackie Bouchard says

    June 14, 2017 at 10:05 pm

    Also in the “hoping just stunned” camp. Poor kid. Hope he rallied and got away. (I don’t know what movie that is…. I’m usually good at guessing these things!)

  13. Jen Gabbard says

    June 17, 2017 at 10:06 am

    Like Callie said in the comments maybe it was playing dead. I don’t know if squirrels do that but I’ve seen a chipmunk do it and in my simple brain I’ll just assume all those tree rats are the same. Glad to know he got up though, it’s so funny how we want to help and/or save all the little creatures when we see them in distress. I’m glad to know I’m not alone on this, so perhaps the people who don’t want to help are the weird ones after all.

About Jodi

jodiHi, my name is Jodi. Thanks for stopping by and checking out my blog! I have all kinds of fun writing about my two crazy pups, Sampson and Delilah. Find out more!

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