I think my dogs are trying to kill me.
Don’t scoff at me like that, I have proof! One of these days one of my dogs is going to kill me.
It could be from a skull fracture in the house because:
- Delilah lies on the floor under my reclining seat and I do the wide-legged dance to get up and over her and instead she gets up right as I do and I fall into the stone on the fireplace.
- Delilah races me to the kitchen after I successfully do the wide-legged dance, she trips me and I tumble down the stairs.
- Delilah stands in the doorway of any door I’m trying to enter or exit and I fall over her and smack my head into the wall.
Of course it could always be a massive coronary because:
- Sampson barks, twitches, and jumps while he’s sleeping next to you and you’re certain he’s having some kind of seizure.
- Delilah barks or growls during the night because you moved your feet too close to her. (You know how startling it is to have a dog bark in the middle of the night, it’s like the telephone ringing. It really gets your heart racing.)
- Sampson can’t remember he had expensive ACL surgery and jumps off a three foot wall. (I think I really felt a pain in my chest when I saw that.)
- Delilah eats anything (and everything) she can find, regardless if it’s edible or not.
On second thought, it’s more than likely to happen outside because:
- Delilah steps in front of me on our walks trying to get at the treat bag and trips me and I fall in the road.
- Sampson and Delilah tug me so hard on our walk that I slip and hit my head on a rock.
- Delilah runs around me to grab a treat and wraps the leash around me.
My best guess is, it will be because Sampson and Delilah each want to travel down a different path and face plant me into a tree.
These dogs….I swear. A lot actually. 😉
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