SDS

Both the dogs in my house have SDS.

You may know it in lay terms as Spoiled Dog Syndrome.

It manifests itself in a number of different ways, but here is a prime example.

We all have assigned spots on the bed, Hubby and I each on one side, Sampson in between us and Delilah curled up at the bottom in the middle.

Normally I use carrots to lure Sampson into his position.  While I’m going this, Delilah sits next to the bed.  (One for Delilah, one for Sampson.  One for Sampson, one for Delilah.)

Once they’ve both had their carrots, Delilah jumps up and I pet and love her for a few minutes, then I settle in to read until I’m tired.

Tuesday night after all the carrots had been dispensed, Delilah jumped up on the bed but stretched out on the wrong side.

This basically turned me into a Lab sandwich.  I didn’t mind so much because it was warm and I thought it was cute and figured she’d move by the time I’d finished reading.

I woke up at 11:15, the light was still on, Delilah was still on the wrong side of me and a lumberjack had replaced my Hubby in the bed.

I shut off the light and tried to wiggle my way into a lying position.

I couldn’t.

I thought well I can sleep sitting up, I mean I just slept sitting up for about half an hour, why couldn’t I do it again?

I forgot about the lumberjack in my bed.  He was cutting some heavy wood, the chainsaw working over-time.

I tossed in the towel, got up and took a half a Xanax.  I know, I know!  I don’t like to ingest unhealthy things, but I do make an exception for alcohol and Xanax, although not normally at the same time.

I went into the other room to play a mindless game until I fell asleep.  After about an hour I got tired, so I shut the light off and lay down to sleep.

What was that noise? Is someone outside? I got up and looked out the window. Why is the motion sensor light on?  Who’s out there?  Am I in danger?

I gave it up and thought I’ll try reclining on the couch and see if that works, but changed my mind and instead headed back to the bedroom.

I’ll take my chances with the lumberjack, at least his snoring should scare off an intruder.

The lumberjack was still at work, but the blade had dulled somewhat so the sawing wasn’t so intense. I think I might be able to do this!

Except Sampson was stretched across my pillow.

Sampson eye mask Please Mama, I’m trying to get my beauty rest.

Thankfully Delilah had moved, she was now curled against the lumberjack’s legs.

 

IMG_0727 Do not disturb my REM cycle.

I stroked Sampson’s head, you gonna let Mama in buddy?

Nothing.

What the hell, why not? 

I pulled back the blanket, threw a pillow down and curled up at the bottom of the bed, next to Delilah.

After a few minutes I thought I heard a growl.  (Delilah has some scarring on her feet and there are certain times (mostly when she’s sleeping) where she does not like anything moving near her feet.)

I figured the lumberjack must have moved.

Just on the verge of sleeping when Delilah barks.  I open my eyes to find her staring at me.

Stop it, I say.  Lay down and go to sleep.

Two minutes later she barks again.

I open my eyes to find her staring at me once again. Like I moved in that tiny corner lot I had!

Why not?  I’ve already lost hours of sleep, what’s a few more minutes?  I proceed to have a staring contest, in the dark with my dog.  Finally I look at her and point with my finger and tell her get down.

She stares at me.

I point again, get down!

She scootches over and puts her head under my chin.

We both sigh and fall asleep.

And that’s how Hubby found me curled up at the bottom of the bed on Wednesday morning.

What happened last night babe?

What are you talking about Paul Bunyon?

(I apologize for my lack of pictures, but flashes definitely disturb the REM cycle.)

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Comments

  1. says

    Absolutely hilarious!!!! We let our babies impede our sleep and for some of us even our bathroom routine, when there is a dog or a cat in the vicinity. I have been known to wait til the last second to use the bathroom if there is a sleeping kitty on my lap! Can’t wake the babies!

    • Jodi Stone says

      Isn’t it funny? My non-animal friends will say, “NO WAY! I wouldn’t give up my bed for a dog.” But they give me so much, I figure the least I can give is my bed once in a while. :-)

      (Did you ever wait too long?) ;-)

  2. says

    What a mess! Just the cats sleep in bed, I sleep in my bed on the floor next to mom and my sister likes to sleep downstairs by the door where it is cooler unless she gets scared, then she comes upstairs and sleeps in our bathroom for security. I do snore when I am really woofed and mom makes fun of me.The cats are good about giving mom her space in bed but Sophie does like to wake her up way too early which no one appreciates.

    • Jodi Stone says

      See cats just take it upon themselves to do whatever they want. Wait a minute, maybe Delilah is part cat!

      Sampson snores too and we generally chuckle at that.

      And you are right, no one appreciates being woken up early!

    • Jodi Stone says

      I think it’s something we are used to. We have kids so hence the broken sleep, then when the kids go, we get dogs. BOL

      Hope you had a great day Molly!

  3. Sue @ The Golden Life says

    That is just too funny!! My hubby’s a regular lumberjack himself, so I know where you’re coming from. As a result of YEARS of caring for aging poodles, I’m a very light sleeper, so I usually end up sleeping in the other, with Callie on a dog bed on the floor and Shadow on the bed next to me. (Ducky sleeps in her crate in the room downstairs.)

    • Jodi Stone says

      I’m typically a light sleeper too Sue, always have been. :-) If I just made the other room mine, it wouldn’t be too bad, but I don’t generally sleep well when I’m not in my own bed. :-(

  4. says

    Oh my goodness how funny! And I thought I had it bad with just a single cat who insists on sitting on my chest all night. Love the pictures!

  5. says

    Serious sympathy.

    Our “routine” goes something like this: everybody gets in bed and gets comfortable. Silas is curled up in the middle of the bed. Then, something happens that makes him bark. He can only go back to sleep if he gets between me and the edge of the bed. This raises my body temperature to approximately 125 degrees, but I can’t get out from under the covers.

    • Jodi Stone says

      You poor thing. I wish I could get one of them to sleep on the edge, I actually think I would sleep better.

      And trust me, when you hit the menopause you will love the heater, they tell you about the hot flashes, but they don’t tell you about the cold. :-(

  6. Frankie Furter and Ernie says

    SDS…. WE have that !!! It is GRRRRREAT.

    We have no idea why our MOM is both LAUGHING and CRYING about this post. She is mumbling somthingy about JUST LIKE OUR BED… And LACK of Sleep.
    Peeps are sooooooo funny aren’t they?

  7. says

    Ha! Though our dogs don’t sleep with us, I can certainly relate. When I do invite them up while I’m reading or watching a movie, I’ve got Sadie squished on one side, Hurley on the other and Maggie at my feet. There’s no moving on my part!

    We also had a SDS moment this morning. I gave Maggie a whole strawberry, which she spit out and looked at suspiciously. What? My girl doesn’t like strawberries? Nope. Turns out that she just needs her strawberries to be chopped into bite size pieces and then she was more than happy to gobble them down. Not spoiled. Not one bit. ;)

    • Jodi Stone says

      LOL isn’t it funny the things we do for our pets? I love that she wouldn’t eat the strawberry until it was cut, but even more I love the fact that you cut it!!

  8. says

    Bwa ha ha! And that’s exactly why Honey sleeps in a crate. And why I’m very happy on the rare occasions we share a bed, that she’s only 50 pounds. :)

    I used to be married to a lumberjack too. But he’s lost a few pounds lately and the chainsaw has disappeared. Food for thought? :)

    • Jodi Stone says

      Well truthfully I snore as well. :-)

      Don’t think the whole weight issue hasn’t come up, there’s just some things you can’t force people to do. You’ll see when you meet him. ;-)

  9. says

    Too funny :) Cali has never been one to sleep in the bed with us, and now we can’t even get her to come up on the bed :( Maybe it’s the three cats . . I usually wake up sandwiched between two of them, with one sleeping between my legs!!

    • Jodi Stone says

      Ah yes, I’ve woken up to Sampson sleeping between my legs too, LOL it’s not the most comfortable thing! I imagine three cats would be quite challenging.

      Sad that Cali won’t go up. :-(

    • Jodi Stone says

      Yup, I tell them there’s not many people that would give up their beds for their pets. But they don’t listen. ;-)

  10. says

    It’s funny that Rumpy does not sleep in my bed, but sometimes he does like to share the bed with me until I go to sleep. Or sometimes, he likes to get in the bed before I do, then pout when I dare to suggest he move over. Sadly it’s the cats that take over the bed, but they do so after I am asleep. If I ever wake up in the middle of the night, forget about it!

    • Jodi Stone says

      So does he get down after you’ve fallen asleep? Sampson will do that in the summer when it is warmer.

      Yes, I’ve gotten up to pee and lost my spot too!!

  11. fallconsmate says

    there is a king sized bed in our bedroom. TheEngineer (and his bipap machine, AKA the nose hose) are on one side. i’m on the other side. Shadow, who tips the scales at about 6.5 pounds, is in the middle….at the beginning of the night, when i am reading.

    once the light is off? she starts HER routine, which is to sneak over to TheEngineer, and turn on the sooper seekrit doggeh heating powers. which causes him to scoot over. rinse, repeat, till he’s hanging on the edge of the bed, at which point she sniffs her little nose in the air and returns to the center of the bed. she has once again made SURE that THAT MAN cannot get close to HER MAMA.

    forget about “adult time” unless she’s shut outside the bedroom. then we open the door to see her sitting there as though to say “how DARE you be in there by yourselves making noises and interesting smells!” *wry smile* and yet we love the little beasties, don’t we?

  12. Jodi Stone says

    That’s cute, stay away from Mama!

    Yes, “adult time” is challenging, we typically have to sneak away and shut a door and then typically they find us, whereupon Delilah will sit outside it barking and Sampson will just lay outside waiting for the door to open.

    But yes, we love the wee beasties!

  13. says

    You’re too much Jodi. I draw the line at the dogs sleeping on the bed while we are on it, and the cats get booted from the bedroom at night as well.

  14. says

    I’m chuckling because I relate to that (mis) adventure! Out of the seven there are always three on the bed, sometimes four. For a while there were six trying to cram in and claim a spot – yes, that was a bit much! The one who refuses to move is deaf Azule, she can get nudged and nudged. Since she is only around 40 pounds, moving her isn’t too difficult. Some experts say that people don’t get a good sleep with dogs on the bed but I wouldn’t sleep well without them!

  15. says

    oh man, i so know how you feel–even with one less dog. he takes up enough room for three dogs, especially now that we are all sharing a full-sized bed (that’s a hoot). also, those pix with the eye masks? amazing! i sleep with one myself, but i’m pretty sure if i tried to slip one on desmond he would be displeased. :-)

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